Honest to God

To me, one of the most important aspects of true intimacy with the Father is complete honesty. Having the ability to be painfully honest with God (the One who tells us to cast all our anxieties on Him because He cares about every detail of our lives)is essential. However, in my humanity, I have a hard time being totally honest with God without feeling disrespectful toward Him.

One of my biggest spiritual struggles is finding the fine line between reverence for God and familiarity with God... the place where I fear Him with a Holy fear, but also tenderly call Him Abba. He longs to take us to a deeper understanding of why He is "All in All," and what His sovereignty really means.

I want to know Him so loosely that I can call out, "Lord, I praise You, I love You," and, "Lord I don’t understand, I'm mad, but even so hallowed be Thy Name."

Just the other day I was writing in my journal, asking a lot of life’s questions like, "Why this, why not that?" I stopped and started pouring it all out to Him. "Lord, I'm having a hard time trusting You with all the details of my life. I know You and I love You, but I am weak and tired and my trust is waning. "It’s so weird, because at that moment of complete honesty, I felt so close to Him. I knew that He understood all of my fears. In my weakness I felt His strength. (2 Corinthians 12:9).

The most important relationship I have is with my God, and in order for any relationship to grow, we have to be completely honest. We can tell Him anything. I think He can handle it. After all, He is Almighty God.

Heather Floyd

Heather sings with the group "Point of Grace" and is a songwriter and earnest seeker of the heart of God.